Foreward: unofficial, unreliable, but mostly true synopsis

@Odell_WTF

Y’all pray for me. I just reread my “whatever it is.” So many errors. “Blink” shows up four times in two paragraphs. Also, what is “she” referring to?? 👀 Been writing this in my head for years. You live with it now. You’re welcome. #WriterProblems #NoImNotManic

@AugustineReads

It started with grief. 💔 Add faulty genes. 🧬 Stir in trauma 🥣

@ImogeneRumbleMD

Written by a brain wired by Flannery O’Connor and possibly a crow. Yes, I didn’t speak up about her diagnosis in time. It’s called professional courtesy.

@Odell_WTF

Thank you for forgiving me first. 🙏  #RadicalFriendship

@ImogeneRumbleMD

No, YOU forgave ME first. Also, “you” bought me an IKEA chair.

@Odell_WTF

“I” was being practical. Forgiveness happened at Hole 9 at Plague Putt Putt.

@EdnaLee_LPC

As your licensed friend: Forgiveness is not a competitive sport. Y’all almost cried in sync 🥇. Breakthrough occurred near fiberglass livestock 🐐. IMHO: Looked more like cow tipping in Twin City, GA. #MyOpinionsAreMyOwnNotThoseOfMyEmployer #PsychItOrNot

@MicahTheDogGA

Her friends implanted a metaphorical microchip. Not to fence her in — just to help her find her way back when things got too loud. We dogs understand loyalty. 🐶 ❤️

#GoodDog #PackLife

@TheRealMargaretKayFaulknerPR

Micah is so right. I’m quietly sobbing into the drywall. 😭 #DogPhilosopher #PronouncedFortnerNotFaulkner #WeirdSoutherners

@ImogeneRumbleMD

@TheRealMargaretKayFaulknerPR We all know Micah’s account is a sock puppet.

@MicahTheDogGA

🐝 Buzz kill.

@ElizaBelleBeLoud

Let me see if I have this right. 🧵

(1/3) Odell flamed out at Duke 🔥📚, came home to a house full of ghosts 👻, got a dog with a Ph.D. in eye contact 🎓🐕, and turned her toolshed was really a communion chapel.

@ElizaBelleBeLoud

(2/3) Y’all performed forgiveness like a summer stock production of Godspell at the mini-golf course ⛳🎭. #ExcuseMeWhat

@ElizaBelleBeLoud

(3/3) And somehow this ends in a sermon and mad people. 💭 Just making sure I didn’t imagine it. #LitPhDSeekingNarrativeArc

@PastorLutherYouGotTime

Other things you’ll find in this “manuscript”: drag queens preaching without knowing it 👑📣, a covert op at PetSmart 🐾, and a forgiveness role-playing game 🎲

@ElizaBelleBeLoud

It’s really all about partials: partial dentures , partial healing, partial email she never finishes. #WorkInProgress

@AugustineReads

It’s not about teeth. It’s about anointed absence. God, good genes, maternal warmth — Odell never got the whole set.  #GraceInPieces

@TheRealMargaretKayFaulknerPR

📸 I took 1,400 photos. A day. At the house raising. Posted 3. Edited 4 for the newsletter. Finally found one for the press release. Deleted the rest. 🗑️

@SheShedBlessYall

I say this with love: That photo of me with the hammer? 🔨 I look like I just wrestled a gator 🐊 in the site dumpster over the last good 2×4. By God, I won. 🏆 #ConstructionQueen

@PastorLutherYouGotTime

If you think God only works in wholeness, bless your heart ❤️. Sometimes grace comes in pieces 🧩. #HolyFragments

@ElizaBelleBeLoud

@HavaNeseDayClaire tried to baptize a goldendoodle 🐾. Y’all, It was CHURCH.

@HavaNeseDayClaire

It was a divinely inspired goldendoodle ✨🐩. I regret NOTHING. #BaptizedAndFabulous

@TheRealMargaretKayFaulknerPR

Micah has:

✅ Instagram

✅ A theology of canine redemption

✅ A feature story in Pembroke Living

@EdnaLee_LPC

You want answers? Do your own research. 🕵️‍♀️📚 #BlessYourHeart

@ImogeneMD

At least I didn’t have to call time of death on anybody this time. Small victories. 🕒

@Odell_WTF

“They also serve who only stand and wait.” ⏳